Drop by Drop life goes out!

Two years back in the October month I finished my Amritsar-Delhi-Chandigarh trip. After returning to campus i enjoyed each and every day of my life at campus as it was my last cultural festival(OASIS). In this ecstasy i forgot everything including myself. Few days later my phone was not working. I got a mail from my a least know junior informing me to call up my cousin as soon as possible. In that mood only thing i thought was positive so I thought that my cousin got a job and was leaving soon. Then another call to my friends cell phone asking me to call up immediately. I still couldn't sense the urgency of the matter. At last i called up my uncle, to hear something which i would never would have thought in my worst nightmares.

He informed me that my mother was sick. Sick is a generic word sometimes makes me sick too, you never know the how convoluted the situation is after hearing this word. After hearing to his words i called up my dad immediately. He seemed to be hiding something from me. I enquired if she was alright and if i could talk to her now. He informed me that everything was alright and she would be fine with in days. He asked me to come as soon as i could to a place called Vellore in Tamil Nadu. I was then studying in a place near Rajasthan. I didn't know what to do next. I informed my Warden regarding this and packed my bag. Somethings which i can never forget in this journey is that few friends are just for name sake and few will cross any boundaries to help you. One of my friends understood the complexity of the situation and offered to come with me. I was moved by his reaction. No one else even bothered to ask. Some showed sympathy but no help at last. But i was least worried about them. Then we headed to the Delhi station. In the early morning at around 4 am we arrived at Delhi station and took the ticket for Vellore. My train was at 10:30 am and my friend left few hours earlier.

Train journey lasted for two days. My mind was filled with all kinds of thoughts. Baffled about the situation, i couldn't think of anything else. Finally the train halted at the station where i had to get down to go to vellore by bus. My cousin came to pick me up. First question i asked him was how my mother was. He told me that situation was not good. He told me that she would look a bit distorted due to the medicines, so dint be afraid after seeing her. I then went to the room where we all stayed together. I never saw my dad in such a dejected form. He told me about what he knew about the situation but two my astonishment he knew nothing. My aunt and my cousin didn't tell him much as he may not handle stress at his old age. I was informed before hand not to tell dad anything. Next day morning i went to meet mom. She lied down in her bed with all syringes on her hand. She was in coma, we tried to wake her up but no response. I was late by one day, till the previous day she was normal but today she went in coma. What a luck i thought? Then a marathon started. The doctors came and went. I talked to them. They told me that her liver was malfunctioning, and could cease at any moment.

What would be the reaction of a teenager to such a statement? My dad was dumbfounded by the doctors statement. It was around lunch time and we had our lunch. I dropped dad at the hotel and was waiting in the hospital ward with my cousin and aunt. My aunt and my cousin went for lunch and i was left alone. In the mean time i was trying to distract myself by playing around with my cellphone. Soon a nurse came out running and called up the nearest doctor. Doctors informed me that condition was critical and she needed to be shifted to a higher ward. I agreed to their statement and helped the compounders push the trolley to the next cabin. I was running with the trolley when my aunt and cousin showed up. Their faces were surprised to see me with the trolley. Then after half an hour they shifted her to the Intensive care unit in the hospital.

ICU(Intensive Care Unit) allows visitors to see their patients only 2 times a day. So we stayed there for sometime and left for the room. In the evening my cousin and my aunt told me in person that if your mother dies then where would you like to do the rituals. I felt like slamming their head in the wall, how come they can think of such things when someone is alive. They were assured of her death as the doctors at Visakhapatnam and Vellore gave their word. And then the final fall of her health at the end of third day, the doctors told that her kidneys were not working. I saw tears coming out of my dad eyes. It was a rare incident as i never saw my dad crying. Till then i didn't cry as i didn't want to weaken my dad by crying, i had to support him at that time. Doctors finally gave their word that she could die any where between 12 to 24 hours. My cousin stayed outside the ICU whole night to notify us of any eventualities. That night was worst night for me. I couldnt sleep. I cried like a baby who lost its beloved toy. Moreover i couldn't share my emotions with any one. It was a hell for me. Morning i woke up after my cousin called up and told that everything was fine. And he wanted me to come there to see mom. I was freshing up and then came the second call. My aunt looked at me and she could understand my facial expression and told me not to tell dad about this. Dad asked me if everything was alright. I lied, i had no other option. I took dad for breakfast, he took his blood pressure tablets. Then we headed towards the ICU.

My dad had no clue about what he might have to face inside the closed room. I couldn't control my emotions. We entered the room and doctors at last told us that she no longer belonged to this world. I can still hear those words echoing in my ears. My dad almost lost his self. He kept on crying for a hours and hours together. Blaming himself about the current situation. Then i got a call from my brother who was in USA, who wanted to know about the situation. I couldn't tell him the truth. He was in much more ignorance then what my dad was. I told him that everything was fine and that mother was still in ICU. My brother didn't know anything until he came to India. I can understand how he felt after the words fell in his ears. Lying sometimes hurts lesser than truth.

We were still in vellore and had to decide where we need perform the last rituals. Atlast we decided that we would take the dead body to vizag. We took her body on train from Madras to Vizag. Meanwhile we got calls from a whole bunch of relatives, friends and well wishers weeping over mother's death. Bringing the body from vellore to vizag was not easy. My cousin and my aunt had done a great job in doing all the necessary arrangements for the same. Having a good rapport with the family and friends helps a lot. I can never forget the assistance they gave when we were in such a situation. I must thank them for all they have done.

Finally we arrived at vizag. After getting down the dead body was carried over an ambulance to the nearby ceremonial ground. By this time my brother and other relatives had already arrived at the burial place. All these arrangements were done by my uncles at Vizag. The rituals got over in an hour. We went back to my uncles place to stay there for 14 days.

At that time when all this happened it was nothing but a nightmare for me. With relatives going and coming for the next two weeks we were busy with them and trying to forget about the whole thing. But things were not easy for my father who just had spent his whole life with her. We stayed with parents only for till tenth standard but after that we used to visit our house twice or thrice in a year. My father was totally broken after this incident. He couldn't control his emotions at the slightest thing reminding this incident. One day all our relatives were assembled at one place and were chit chatting there, my mind was still searching where mom was, i could feel something was missing from my life.

After this whole incident i went back to my college, completed all my remaining exams and in the semester holidays i came back to my house at Dhanbad. When i stepped inside the house my eyes were still searching for the familiar figure in the house. Alas no one was there, i had to consolidate my mind. Emotions were flowing in and out of my body.

It is said that “An optimist laughs to forget, a pessimist forgets to laugh.” I could learn so many new things in my life. First one is that if you have good friends who will help you any time are rare to find. And if you find one then they you should rarely miss them. Second one is that whenever you give something to any one it comes back from some one else in some other form. My parents did charity to many people, they had good rapport with a number of friends and relatives, and which inturn helped us when we were in such bad situation. Thirdly, when you think life is going to be as you wish , life takes a U turn. Lastly never rely on doctors. My mom was treated with wrong treatement for a period of 3 months which eventually led to her death.

This is just the part 1 of my story. The later posts will have the story half year after the whole incident.